What hat are we wearing and how do we get it to suit us?

In film or theatre reviews we often read about whether an actor played the role well. For the plays or films that are remakes or repeats we may even see terms like ‘x’s Lady Macbeth’ or ‘y’s portrayal of James Bond’. 

When it comes to acting we know the actor is playing a role. Still their performance is often evaluated as how they have depicted something; it is their version of a role. 

A similar assessment is often made of athletes. In football, teams have a jersey number that comes with expectation and meaning from previous players who have worn that jersey. Other sports talk about individuals being guardians for a shirt in a team. While players play roles, like actors, they are (most often) selected to bring their strengths and form to that position, to that role, and to that team.

So when it comes to us, how clear is the role we are playing in our context?

How much are we playing our version of the role, by bringing our qualities, strengths and experiences?

How much are we playing the role we think we should based on the expectations that role brings? 

Or put another way, what hats are we wearing and how do we wear them best? 

What hat am I wearing? What is the hat for this situation? 

Which hat does this situation require? 

If it is raining I’ll likely not be wearing my sunhat. If I’m at the races I’d be wearing one of the fancy hats they wear there. If I’m on a building site I’ll have a hard hat. 

What hats are you wearing? 

Roles are always contextual, that is we don’t have a role in a vacuum. In a given setting we could even have many roles. 

On a recent coach training course I was co-leading, trainers had to switch between a range of roles from trainer, to facilitator, to coach, to coachee, to timekeeper and many more. All of those roles fell under the wider role of training team member, yet which one was brought in, which hat was worn, depended on the situation.

What is the role we have in our wider context? 

What are the mini roles within that context? When do these roles come up?

What is on our hat stand? 

Just as there are many hats for many weathers we have many roles in our lives, as we inhabit many contexts. 

For example, my hats or roles involve being a friend, a son, a partner, a coach, a colleague, a trainer, a facilitator, an aspiring writer… the list continues. 

If we don’t know what is on our hat stand we can’t know what roles we can take let alone think about which one fits a context best.

What if we’re wearing multiple hats?

We don’t necessarily only wear one hat at a time, but there will always be one hat on top. 

What is the hat that best fits our context? How do we wear it alongside our other hats? 

How often are we switching hats? 

What helps us keep track of our hats? 

What helps us switch hats? 

How do I wear this hat best?

Going back to the actor’s depiction of a character, how do you best wear your hat? 

What is it that makes that hat your hat rather than a generic hat?

How are you wearing it in a way that plays to your strengths? 

It sounds obvious to write but we are not the hat, we are the ones that wear the hat, whether we have been asked to or have chosen to, we can choose how to wear it.

And if you’re anything like me it can take time to find the way the hat fits best. 

What does choosing how to wear the hat involve for you? 

How will you know when the hat fits well?

What do you need to help the hat fit well? 

What is the hat you most want to wear? 

When it is sunny I don’t always wear a hat and then I struggle to see and get fed up with keeping my hands up to shade my eyes and then I don’t enjoy the sunshine. Sometimes I know I should wear a sunhat and still don’t.

What is the hat you are neglecting to wear? 

What would it be like to wear it? 

What impact would it have to wear the hat you most want to wear but sometimes choose not to?

What would it be like if we all wore the hats we wear best and we wore them in the way that suits us best?